Some Bulletin announcements...
"Don't let worry kill you - let the Church help."
"Thursday night - Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow."
"At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'what is hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice."
"Next Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the cost of a new carpet. All those wishing to do something on the new carpet will come forward and do so."
"Wednesday the Ladies' Liturgy Group will meet. Mrs Smith will sing 'Put Me In My Little Bed', accompanied by the pastor."
Making a clean breast of it: -"Volunteers please to help clean the bras at St John's." (...Fortunately) "they only need attention a few times a year".
A church in Florida was asked how many people the church could sleep in case of a hurricane. The minister replied, "On Sunday morning we sleep about 200."
And finally, a church having discipline problems with some of the younger children? "Does anyone have a guillotine they no longer want? If so, the playgroup would love to hear from you."
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page last updated 5 OCTOBER 1997