The Parish Church of St George the Martyr, Waterlooville
Summer Edition 2011
Unusual Epitaphs: A Warning to Widows
Having written over 120 descriptions of Hampshire and West Sussex churches, I feel I have exhausted this topic. Instead I plan to write in future about interesting and unusual memorials I have come across on my travels, beginning with an amusing 18th century epitaph I stumbed across in a Suffolk church whilst on holiday last year. -
Whilst on holiday in Suffolk recently I visited the lovely village church of St Andrew’s Bramfield. It was unusual in that it had a bright yellow thatched roof together with a tall round tower standing separately in the churchyard.
Inside I was attracted by an ornamental chancel screen which had five saints painted on the lower part. Looking down I suddenly became aware that I was actually standing on an 18th century tomb slab with a lengthy inscription carved upon it. It related the sad story of Bridgett Applewhaite who died in 1737.
Between the Remains of her brother EDWARD
And of her Husband Arthur
Here lies the Body of BRIDGETT APPLEWHAITE
Once BRIDGETT NELSON.
After the Fatigues of a Marrried Life,
Born by her with Incredible Patience
For four Years and three Quarters, bating three weeks,
And after the Enjoiment of the Glorious Freedom
Of an Easy and Unblemisht Widowhood
For four Years and Upwards
She Resolved to run the Risk of a Second Marriage Bed.
But DEATH forbad the Banns -
And having with an Apoplectick Dart
(The same Instrument with which he had Formerly Difpatcht her Mother)
Touch’t the most Vital part of her Brain.
She muft have fallen Directly to the Ground
(as one Thunder-
If she had not been Catch’t and Supported
by her Intended Hufband.
of which Invisible Bruise
After a Struggle for above Sixty Hours,
With that Grand Enemy to Life
(But the certain and Mercifull Friend to Helplefs Old Age)
In Terrible Convulsions, Plaintive Groans or Stupefying Sleep
Without recovery of her Speech or Senses,
She Dyed on the 12th day of Sep in y Year of our Lord 1737
And of her own Age 44.
Behold I Come as a Theif. Rev 16 15 V.
But Oh, Thou Source of Pious Cares
Strict Judge without Regard
Grant tho’ we Go hence Unawares
We go not Unprepared.
So any St George’s Waterlooville widows contemplating a second marriage take heed of Bridgett and beware.
John Symonds
St Andrew’s Bramfield, Suffolk